“If only words could express everything, the heart wished. There wouldn’t have been any known thing such as silence.”
Those were her last words, the last words she would ever say to me. But I wish I knew this at that moment. She waited for me to speak, her eyes looked at mine with hope, but turned away, breaking her heart. There was nothing else left for her to stay, as she thought and left, slamming the door behind her. Left in the wildest storm, though I had an idea that the storm outside was nothing compared to the storm going inside of her. But yet I didn’t do anything. I just let her go, to play with deadly winds as that night nature had hit with its utmost rage.
Neither did I go behind her or tried stopping her, as for some reason I was very confident that she would come back, once her anger subsides. So I waited. An hour passed by and the winds outside grew aggressive, but she did not return. A day passed by the storm had settled a bit, but she didn’t come. Soon a week passed by and then a month, but she didn’t come. And today, seven years have gone by, but she yet hasn’t come. I wonder where is she now, how is she, is she dead or alive. I don’t know.
All I know is that her absence has made me realize the worth of her presence. She left, but her words never left my mind or my heart. They still echo in my ears and make me wonder, what if…what if that night I had just stopped her from leaving, held her hand, kissed her forehead and said I love you. What if, I were just courageous enough to not turn away, and look her in the eyes and admit my mistake. Or what if, she herself would have come back the very next day, so that I could tell her, that, “from this day ahead, my every moment shall pass in order to win your heart back. In a try to get your trust back.” But I was too late. I guess she wanted me to crave for her the way she did for me, even when were together. Hence, she never came back.
The irony is that the one who taught her how to be silent failed to listen what her lips never said. What not I did to find her, but I believe even the fate didn’t want us to meet. Even god didn’t want her heart broken anymore. Hence, it has been seven long years without her. The time we shall never get back, even if I find her.